Is Shame Beneficial? |
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| Daily Dose of Reason - Psychology & Self-Improvement | ||||
| Friday, 16 July 2010 00:00 | ||||
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Shame is like static or interference in a radio, computer or television transmission. It serves no purpose. It gets in the way. Shame is not responsibility. Responsibility is adherence to reality and the willingness to hold in mind all the relevant facts of reality at all times. Shame is endlessly condemning oneself for having made a prior mistake; it’s a form of living in the past, the flip side of whining and being a victim (also a form of living in the past). To allow yourself to be motivated by shame is to be motivated by a negative -- by the sense that, "I mustn't be a bad person." This isn't the way to lead your life. The way to lead your life is to be motivated by being a good person; and by discovering what "good" actually means.