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Parental Claims

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Daily Dose of Reason - Ethics
Written by Michael J. Hurd, Ph.D.   
Wednesday, 29 April 2009 00:00
No parent may say to the child, once grown, in effect: “I sacrificed for you; therefore you owe me.” A sacrifice means giving up a greater good for a lesser good. If your mother or father means to imply this, then they're insulting you. They're saying that they had better things to do than to raise you. Well, if they did—then that’s THEIR problem for making such a stupid choice. And if their purpose really was to raise you well and enjoy the results, they should be happy that you’re happy. If your parents are miserable and have nothing, and yet still see that you’re happy, then rationally they ought to be glad that they contributed (if they did) to your happiness. It's worth mentioning that the parents who make a claim on their grown children are usually the parents who did the least to contribute to a child's happiness. If they saw parenthood as a duty, a burden or a selfless act all along, then it's unlikely they did much to contribute to the happiness of their children as adults.
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